Being old enough now to be expected to come up with some helpful sage advice,I decided to write the complete instructional manual on how to become successful in “Showbiz.”
Before continuing, though, you must figure out what part of “Showbiz” you want to be involved in.
Then you have to find somebody to pay you to do it.
It doesn’t matter if you’re a singer, a musician, an actor, a stand-up comedian, a Dee-Jay, or a writer; there are rules.
(A) You begin by preparing an “Attention Getting Opening” for whatever you want to do.
(B) Next, you must put a little “Drama” in it to make the folks wonder where it’s all going.
(C) Then you wrap it up with a “Killer Close.”.
Here are some examples:
When I first saw Louie Andersson, a brilliant stand-up comedian, he walked out on stage and then just stood there and smiled at us for a while
Finally, he said, “Okay, let’s get the fat jokes out of the way.” (Great attention-getting opening.)
Next, he did his regular material. (Drama)
Then he tells us, “So here sits this poor guy with no arms or legs on the edge of Galway Bay in Ireland, enjoying the water as it lapped up on him.
It was a beautiful day, and before long, pretty Colleen happened by and immediately ran over to hug him.
Then she asks, “Oh, you poor thing, have you ever been kissed,” and he sadly shakes his head no, so she gives him a big smacker.
Then when she asks him if he’s ever been fooked, he lights up like a Christmas tree and says no.
She then says, “Well, you’re soon to be when that fooking tide rolls in. And with that, Louis drops the mic and walks off the stage to a ton of laughter.(Killer Close)
The James Bond films usually open with a spectacular view of a foreign city you can only imagine visiting.
In the drama-filled middle part, James spends most of his time making love to gorgeous women and killing bad guys.
Bond movies always end with a suspenseful cliffhanger designed to get us back to the theatre for the next one.
Jay Black used to be the lead singer of Jay and the Americans, so when a bunch of “oldies” acts, including him, showed up in town, I went to see them.
When it was Jay’s turn to hit the stage, he started singing backstage. Weird.
Then, when he finally walked out on stage singing this song we’d never heard of, he was wearing a chintzy grey high school-looking tux that no doubt he’d purchased when he was much lighter.
When he ended the song to some polite applause, he said, “The reason I did that song is because my tunes are challenging to sing, so that song gives me a chance to check out my pipes, and you get a chance to say, Jesus, what happened to him?” He owned us.
He then proceeded to do all his hits, saving Cara Mia, which is almost operatic in nature for his last song. When he hit every note perfectly, we gave him a standing ovation. us.
Of the three, the most important is the “Killer Close.” Even Hey Jude, live has an ending.
Oh, and no great novel ever began, “And there I was having a salad when…
COMMENTS
@CraigWalker: It isn’t that I hated Christmas music. It was being forced to play it in late October and early November. Ridiculous. Even if the numbers don’t lie. 5/26/24
Geo: I hear ya, Craig; I couldn’t bring myself to do it until after Thanksgiving. “One Holiday at a Time” is my motto.
@AlanSterger: Hey George: At F105 (WVBF), the song “More than a Feeling” by Boston was edited (very well), localizing it: “I looked out this morning and the sun was gone Turned on some ‘F105’ to start my day.”Was this your idea? Was it done in any other Fairbanks markets” (5/19/24)
Geo: We came up with it in LA, Alan, where we found some folks who could mimic the real artists, so we’d drop them in.
@ArtVuolo: Hey George, was that photo of you on a train? Bright-Line or Tri-Rail? Just wondering; some of us need captions! (5/17/24)
Geo: It was on Amtrak, Art. My next one will be with my eldest daughter, Candis when we go from Boston to LA.
Like this:
Like Loading...
Don’t we wish the answer was a beautiful woman.
