Evangelicals vs Catholics.

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I am starting to make some real progress with my current research project about the wants of women. As you can see I have cut back on the number of participants in my focus groups just so I can get a little more up close and personal. This new approach has me learning things I’m pretty sure a man is not supposed to know but in doing so I may have over served the adult beverages(truth serum)just a tad.

Paul Cavenaugh claims Tebow’s Evangelicals where no match for Buffalo’s Catholics. The good folks in Buffalo I am told even enlisted the Pope’s help so they could use his great connections. It came together nicely for them didn’t it as they stomped the Broncos rather severely.

I wonder how Howard would fare with PPM.

I think the greatest scam in the world may have been the Knights of olden days who claimed they went out every day to slay Dragons. When they returned victorious they got to claim their reward for each dragon slain from the fair Maidens who lived in the castle.(I wonder what the equivalent of Viagra was back then) I find it hard to believe there were ever any Dragons around but then again maybe they were so successful it’s why we don’t see any today.

When I was a kid I needed the biggest speakers I could find to listen to my music through. Cami listens to her music on her i phone.

Is it just me or do Women forgive themselves for “losing it” a lot faster than men. All I know is I always have to buy gifts!

David Wolfe in response to me saying Daryl “B” was a little stiff on the radio claimed Daryl’s stiffness was part of his Canadian charm. David also said my Brother had told him that the Dee Jays in Canada were always a big deal, in America everybody had some dumb cousin who was a jock somewhere.

Have you noticed the content Dee Jays deliver now sounds like it was supplied and written by sales and/or the sales promotion department.

Once again I’m going to have to explain to one of the talk show hosts I work with that one of the reasons Ron Chapman, Jeff and Jer plus a few others all made well over a million a year. When these Super Stars talked about being in Walmart they told you which Walmart it was and described exactly where it was located so you could watch the movie in your mind as they talked about some weird incident they had recently observed.

I wonder how the coaches of the San Diego Chargers and the Miami Dolphins who passed on Drew Brees sleep at night.

When I lived in Boston I used to train running along the Charles, as soon as I would see a cute little booty of a College girl up ahead of me I would chant to myself “If You Can Catch her You Can Have her”, “If you can catch her you can have her” This training method did wonders for my fitness.

Speaking of good looking women I have been privileged to date a few over the years but a lot of my friends would constantly say, Hey Man! You better stay away from that one, she is just after your money or wants you to be the Father of her child. I dont know if they were telling me this because of their past experiences but I cant help but smile when ever I see their wives.

Enough about women already lets get back to running. In Boston my running partner was Tim Reever and he reminded me at lunch last week about the lesson I taught him as we were running together one day. Tim said he was pleading with me to help him talk Jim Hilliard out of his unreasonable demands for bigger billing than the current ratings supported. He said I just looked at him for a few seconds and said … Tim in all the years I have worked with Jim I found it was a hell of a lot easier to just give him what he wants rather than try to talk him out of it.

Since most of the radio executives today are not from programming and some aren’t even from radio they have no idea the air talent is turning radio into TV. TV just doesn’t work on radio because Radio is very very personal and most of the people who listen to it are fans of the station not usually just a particular individual. The talent has never really liked that part very much and are determined to change it. Good Luck!

This may look a little self serving and probably is but I think success is measured by happiness. I am much happier than most people I know which makes me reluctant to change my ways even though they have all advised me I should do so if I ever hope to be successful.

I have noticed that over time a lot of people change but not the bad ones and I can spot them within a hundred yards of my Daughters.

The best and worst thing I have ever done my whole life was to never listen to anybody tell me how I should live my life.

I asked Rich Stevens who claims he is a good friend of Randy Michaels if he thought the following saying pertained to Randy in anyway. “The more successful you become the more you tend to stop doing the things that made you successful” Rich abstained.

I believe it is the imperfections of the Angels of Victoria’s Secret that makes them all so beautiful. Those little imperfections give them character and make them seem a lot more interesting. The same could be said for some great radio stations.

Ahhh I see Duffy’s Sports Grill have a new menu. To most of us regulars that usually means the prices have gone up even though most people’s income has not. I guess the folks will just have to go less often and cut back a little on what they order.

What’s Love Got To Do With It !

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As you can see in the included picture I have now switched to focus groups which I am hoping will speed up my current research project on what do Women want in general and specifically what do they want to hear on the radio. I’m doing this project all by myself which tends to drag it out somewhat and I just hope I have the strength to finish it. Nonetheless I am expecting some very exciting results.

Most things I know about women were mostly taught to me by women.

Wow Al Gardner joins Randy Michaels as the big guy at Merlin in Philly. Great move for both of them plus Al gets to go home.

Interesting people in real life do interesting radio shows.

Speaking of radio shows most morning shows are done with content from USA Today which is a complete failure in every market a live morning show is being done out of.

A lot of Canadians this time of year say ” OH S**T ” just before their car starts sliding into the ditch from the slippery ice covered highway they were driving too quickly on. The good folks from Transcona say “Here hold my beer and watch this”

I guess the local police must be trying to collect their Christmas bonuses from us or something. I’ve never seen this many of them out here early in the month before. I just love how they proudly hold up their radar guns and aim them at us. Hell now they are even hiding in Pickup Trucks.

Fear of the unknown is the biggest fear of all soon to be replaced by the known which is not that scary.

It is tough to commit to an uncommitted person.

I have no time for any person who thinks they have more rights than me or even think they should.

When a Man falls in love with a Woman he immediately moves into the protective mode. He would gladly give up his life to protect her but what blows me away is he gets more points for taking out the garbage unasked than he does for his unwavering protection.

Speaking of being in love I feel a man needs to be the “smitten one” in the relationship in order to have the strength to carry out all the projects the Woman of his dreams is going to assign him. I figure the “to do” list is the reason most men die before their wives. They want to!

So the Colts screwed up yet another perfect season.

Speaking of Football Paul Cavenaugh told me just for fun he bought some Green Bay Packers stock which officially made him an owner. Instantly his then previously undefeated team loses the very next game. Paul is now demanding a meeting with the head coach.

My best Christmas present so far is the fact that Cami only has 30 months left until she leaves town for college and she will be spending most of them with me. Thats the good news. The bad news is I have had to cancel most of the guided tours of my bachelor pad. I’m going to miss those sweet young things that wanted to see my gorgeous view plus check out all my hit records I have hanging on the wall.

Jim Hilliard and I were discussing the up coming reunion at CKY in Canada where we first had worked together. We both thought it was sad that they waited this long to do it because several of the guys we worked with back than have already passed on. One of them was a very good friend of mine Daryl B who was instrumental in my ever becoming a recording artist. Jim mentioned that the only reason he had hired Daryl was because we all loved him. He always thought Daryl sounded a little stiff. I recently listened to some old tapes of Daryl and Jim was right he did sound stiff but he loved the music and we all loved him for it. Today my 16 year old Daughter Cami has no time for Dee Jays as soon as they get two words out she hits the scan button looking for another tune she likes. She feels the Dee Jays don’t even notice the music they play let alone love it like she does.

The bar scene is filled with mostly 20 something ladies plus a few late 40’s. But there are very few 30 somethings and there is a good reason for it. And once again I ain’t talking.

Cyber Girl told me what Women look for in Men is wisdom, experience, humor, graciousness and a zest for life and to her age is just a number. Well so far I’ve got the age thing down pretty good but by the looks of that list I’ve got my work cut out for me if I expect to be anything but lonely in 2012

Robin Garret claims it’s real easy to figure out what Women are interested in you “that way”. Well either I’m real dumb or none are but then again maybe it’s a combination of both.

Robin also informed me that there are a lot of people who dont really like me. This of course is not new news to me. I use their dislike as fuel to help me succeed which I know irritates them immensely.

Jamie Gold once said to me “I’ve finally got it figured out” The people who like you are very talented, the ones that don’t aren’t

Oh yeah I almost forgot Robin told me she had Thanksgiving dinner with 4 guys on a big yacht. Wow I said … How lucky for you 4 Men and you being the only female on board pretty good odds no matter how you look at it. The problem she said was there was only one straight guy there, the rest were more like her.

What with Hanuka and Christmas upon us Tebow is going to have to do it on his own. I think the big guys are a little busy.

My favorite Sports interview was Troy Aikman interviewing Tony Roma about playing in Dallas. Tony was going on and on about the great heritage of the Dallas Cowboys when Troy interrupted him with … Are you tired of hearing my name man! I know I was sure tired of hearing Roger Staubach’s when I played here.

Mark this down under “Strange” The Church Cami goes to is closed Christmas Day for the holiday.

Duffy’s … Say It Aint So

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When I first got involved with KVIL hardly anybody was listening to FM. Our job was simple, put something on the air so unique that people will start buying stereo radios for both their homes and their cars just to be able to hear it. I will always remember Ron Chapman helping the folks on air for a week how to set up the new Stereos they got for Christmas in order to get the best sound. First he said you’ve got to put your KVIL AM radio in between the KVIL FM radio speakers so you can have a Bi-sensual experience. Next he would play some effects out of the left speaker then the right one so the folks could check and make sure everything was working properly. Now he would play some great hit tune that just sounded so good in stereo you couldn’t stand to listen to it on AM anymore.

That special sound we launched on KVIL I believe was the first time anybody used hit records on radio to attract adults. In fact Jerry Bobo the Sales Manager was very pissed when we kicked it all off because we had told him the new format we were coming with was going to be for adults only. When he came to realize he knew every tune we were playing he thought we had lied to him and had really gone top 40. Bill Gardner the midday jock thought Mr. Fairbanks hated the name Top 40 and that was why we called it Adult Contemporary.
Ron recently confessed to me at my birthday party that he thought I was crazy back then but when the huge ratings started rolling in it started to sound a whole lot better to him. Now I am in the middle of trying to invent something special that will bring the folks back to the AM dial. I must be masochistic.

Speaking of KVIL I still chuckle about when I asked Jack Schell at The KVIL reunion where all the people were that claimed they were the ones responsible for the enormous success of the station. He answered me with … They’re all outside parking cars!

The task at hand for a air talent is to learn to language the movie they are watching in their head so the audience can see it too.

The only person having any fun in a Porche is the one in the driver’s seat. The person in the passenger seat just wants the ride to be over.

My favorite sports bar Duffy’s just fired my favorite bartender Mimi. Off the record comments from the Duffy’s staff is she was done in by a co-worker and nobody but management is buying what he said about her.

Billy Bob Harris told me that Shirley Temple stopped believing in Santa Clause when she was 6 because when her Mother took her to see him he asked for her autograph.

Charles Shulz claimed you will soon forget all the people making all the headlines. The people who made your journey through school a little easier, friends that helped you during a difficult time, people who made you feel appreciated and special, folks who taught you something worthwhile and someone you just like to spend time with. These people are the people you will never forget.

I had lunch this week with Jo Ann Pflug to talk about a radio project she is currently doing. She was kind enough to bring me a picture from the set of the movie “Mash” which showed Her, Elliot Gould, and Donald Sutherland taking a break. Jo Ann still looks a way too much like Lt. Dish for my comfort so color me smitten.

Speaking of Sutherlands very few people are aware that Keifer’s Grandfather started the health care system in Canada.

I think one of the signs you may be dating a woman much to young for you is after they put make up on they actually look older.

Speaking of dating it has to be a scary moment when you google the name of someone new you are going out with and their mug shot pops up.

For Women marriage is the thing. For Men Women are the thing.

Randy Michaels has achieved a status similar to Frank, Elvis, Dion, Madonna, John, Paul, Ringo & George. The headlines simply read .. Randy buys Philly FM and we all knew who they were talking about.

You’ve got 3 choices to become successful … Be First, Be Best, or Be Different. Be all 3 and you’ll be legendary.

You know you’re becoming a little long of tooth when the air talent starts to refer to you as Mr. Johns.

Have you noticed when we had Presidents in office who fooled around the Country was in much better shape. With that in mind I think Cain may be a helluva choice.

Bad Boy Bobby From The Bay is Rappin’ The Monthly Wrap Up. Check it out

Who The Hell Are You?

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I am continuing as you can see to do deep and extensive research about what women really want to hear on the radio. Just when I think I’m making some headway Russ Morely informs me that all women are exactly the same they just look different. The amount of hours I am putting into this project may be many but it has it’s rewards. Now my new mission in life is to try and disprove Russ’s theory.

Boy that John Elway is an ass isn’t he. Tebow takes the team into a tie for first place on Sunday and he doesn’t even come over to congratulate him or even give him an “atta boy”

So if its true that girls have the bridesmaids dresses picked out at 11 years of age than Tina Turner got it right when she sang … What’s Love Got To Do With It.

Being a concerned parent of a daughter I have uncovered that most nude dancers have tattoos and also a lot of them were recruited from Hooters.

If your an air talent you can double your time spent listening simply by using the YOU word 10 times as often as the I word

Both my Daughters still believe in Santa Clause because I explained to them when they didn’t it only cost them one gift but it was a BIG one.

In South Florida on the Atlantic side Canadians are not well liked because the only ones they see and hear are the ones who are ruder and louder than most New Yorkers. The polite Canadians you always hear about are on the Gulf side of Florida. Most of them are from Western Canada.

I’ve noticed the energy back stage at a Sports Talk station is just like it used to be in the early days of Rock&Roll. In fact I think Sports broadcasting is the New Rock!

Wow they are tearing up my all time favorite station the legendary KGO in San Francisco. I guess Dylan really meant it when he sang ” The Times Are A Changin’ ” but he never claimed all the changes were good.

Speaking of Legends I was on WFTL’s Joyce Kaufman show this week with “Rock&Roll Hall Of Famer” Dion who has a new book out called Dion The Wanderer talks Truth. What a thrill it was for me to swap old Rock&Roll stories with a legend like him. I explained to Dion that the first word I ever said on the radio was his name so it had come full circle. He is also coming out with a new CD in January called a “Tank full Of Blues” so its obvious the Dude ain’t Done.

In Denver and a few other places everybody agrees Tebow is the man except for John Elway, John Fox, and the entire sports fraternity. They all prefer guys like Michael Vic and Cam Newton who have no idea how to win anything.

When you lose to the Seattle Seahawks you know your season is toast. Right Philly!

I love the scam the gas stations are running. In huge numbers they display the price per gallon but in very tiny letters it says cash price. The real price is 5 or 6 cents more.

Ron Chapman told me that he was reading a book about the human thought process and the author claimed most people don’t know as much about anything as they think they do. Which means if his Idea is true, it’s false.

I remember when I got a new car in Toronto during the 70s and tried out the stereo radio that came with it. CKFM was playing 25 or 6 to 4 by Chicago and even though I worked at CFTR I instantly became a FM guy, I had heard the future and the future sounded better. That was the only time radio technically sounded better than it ever had before. Now in this high tech world other than convenience the only thing that has gotten better is TV. Radio actually sounds worse.

I was at my favorite watering hole the other night which is Duffy’s Sports Grill in The Village. I asked Sam the bartender if there was anyway she could try and find The Grey Cup in Vancouver and put it up on one of the screens for me. The Winnipeg Blue Bombers were in it and it would be fun to see it once again although not as much fun as it was when I got to do it in Canada with all my buddies. 15 minutes later there it was. Ya gotta love that black card.

Speaking of the Grey Cup it used to be a very intense rivalry between the East and the West. This year the teams were from Vancouver and Winnipeg. Wait a minute when I lived in Winnipeg it was located in the Midwest, what fool decided it was now in the east … Oh Mr. Businessman!

How do I explain to Cami these are her easy times, it’s all downhill from here.

Speaking of Cami she said she learned in Drivers Ed this week that when you run out of gas just open the gas cap and you can drive for two more miles.

I know for sure that I’m not a womanizer but I think I would like to be. Unfortunately I’m not in charge of that, women are.

I sure don’t hear any excitement about the NBA coming together.

It really doesn’t matter who you used to be it’s who you are now that counts.

There is a huge difference between a system and a process.

When I woke up this morning there was a very loving note from Cami lying next to the coffee maker. She wrote about how much she loved me and enjoyed being my Daughter. The PS read … There is a Concert today at the Fairgrounds today that costs $40 can she and her friend AJ go ?