Faking It!

922866_10151869708724307_1380844229_n1Now that Cami is off to College at USF in Tampa, I can only hope that it’s going to be a lot easier getting her to graduation than it was her sister Candis.
I remember running on the beach in Coronado with Candis the day she said to me … Dad I think I’m gonna drop out of UCLA, it’s not helping me at all with my singing career. I advised her not to quit but just take a semester off and see how she felt after that, thankfully she missed the intellectual part of it, so after a short break went back and graduated Magna Cum Laude.
My first close call with College and Candis (pictured singing at the Roxy in Hollywood and singing below) came in New York where after finishing High School in France, she enrolled at NYU where she studied drama and also made the Dean’s list. After two years though she decides that she can learn acting anywhere and because she really wants to be a singer, she transfers to UCLA to pursue her dreams. Her professor at NYU told her before she left that she was making a big mistake because theatre was the direction she needed to go, not singing in some rock band. He claimed that even now she was wasting her time going to college because she was already good enough to audition for any Broadway Play that she wanted to. He asked her if she needed him to call me so he could explain just how talented you are, she told him not to bother because I was already her biggest fan.

Candis sings her own composition “Let Me”.


Miracles are what you hope for not what you depend on.

Hanging on to what you have keeps you from having what you want.

So ya gotta ask yourself, how excited is Elway really about Manning breaking all those records in Denver.

The only reward for being a good parent is someday realizing you were.

All men speak at least 4 different languages.
1. When they are talking just to men.
2. When they are talking to men but women are nearby.
3. When they are talking to their wives or girlfriends.
4. When they are talking to their Mothers and/or Daughters.

There is no such thing as business ethics there are only ethics.

I hate the word no and detest hearing, I don’t know anything about programming but….

PPM does an excellent job of measuring hearing but an extremely poor job of measuring listening.

My whole life I’ve yearned to be somebody and the other day I finally realized I am. I’m Candis and Cami’s Father.

No matter what I suggest to a PD what I think he should do, he claims he is already doing it.

You better be good lookin’ if you ever sexually harass someone.

Every body agrees with media’s obsession with trying to attract the 25 – 54 year old demo until they turn 55.

Why are attractive women mostly Real Estate Brokers.

Speaking of attractive is there anything sexier looking than a recently divorced woman.

My favorite license plate saying in Canada was “Friendly Manitoba” which I doubt we will ever see in Quebec.

In order to truly coach someone they must give you permission to do so.

My old pal Aristotle once said that it really doesn’t matter what you perceive the truth to be if it’s not true.

Plato said if a morning person wants to be well paid as well as successful then they must learn how to become ” Principals of Influence”.

Socrates claimed that its what’s above the bottom line that is causing the bottom line. 

23% of the population are born leaders so the rest of us have to fake it.

Speaking of percentages according to PPM, 75% of your ratings come from your biggest fans.

92.3 of all statistics are made up on the spot including this one.

Just because the PPM device is deaf in the early morning doesn’t mean the folks are.

You’ll never know how close you were to success if you quit trying.

You win the music battle every time you play a cool tune.

In the early days of KVIL we eliminated Sex Drugs and Rock & Roll and added the “Celebration of Women” as our secret sauce.

If I hadn’t had so much fun my whole life maybe I’d be much younger now.

The responsibility of every Program Director is the make their radio station sound as good as their biggest fans already think it does.

 












  

MOTO GROOVE!

10534757_10203261357427423_1286806006739990500_nCris-Conner-WNAPI first met Cris Conner in the spring of 1973 back when I was hired by Jim Hilliard to be the National PD of Fairbanks and Cris was WNAP’s PD.
We had two great radio stations back in those days and before we were done they ended up being #1 and #2 in Indianapolis.
WIBC was called “Big Mama” in the company mainly because it supplied the money which bought all our other radio stations. It was located up front in the two story brick on North Illinois and way out back was WNAP which the WIBC staff referred to as the company toy and was affectionally known in the street as “The Buzzard”. WIBC had the slick buttoned down type of Jocks who all carried attache cases, WNAP of course had all the strangely dressed long hairs and we didn’t dare ask them what they were carrying.
Seeing the WIBC/WNAP staff chatting with each other in the halls occasionally was a strange sight indeed. I had just moved to Indy from Toronto so everything seemed a little weird to me but Cris and I hit it off right from the git go and to this day he is still a good friend of mine and still a great talent.
Back in those days just before Thanksgiving Fairbanks had it’s annual company confab usually held in Indianapolis. This event was attended by all the Fairbanks GM’s SM’s and PD’s along with the Corporate Staff and the dress code was suit and tie. A lot of us took that opportunity to load up on our winter wardrobes which we would unveil during the meetings but of course we all paled in comparison to Hilliard. I’ll always remember Ron Chapman attending his first one claiming that he was pretty sure that he had it all figured out as he pointed at Cris (pictured with Ann Craig Bruce Munson And Tom Cochran) who was wearing jeans, a top hat, and a mechanic’s smock. I even understand that he refers to himself Ron went on to say, as Moto Groove and dressed as he is amongst all this finery he’s got to have great ratings, so what I’m thinking now is if you have the ratings you can wear whatever the hell you want. You nailed it Ron, and now as you have before him on Saturday November 8 Cris Conner heads into the Radio Hall Of Fame in Indianapolis and I will be there along with the Duffy Twins to proudly see him do it.

 
Why would the middle class vote Republican or Democratic what’s in it for them.
 
Have you ever noticed in all sports all over the world most play by play guys are white.
 
It takes at least two people to have a quarrel but only one to end it.
 
Human rights have come so far in America that you can actually now catch the ebola virus whether you want to or not.
 
It’s a hell of a lot easier to find some new inventors than it is trying to invent new stuff all the time.
 
If Sex & Violence is so bad how come Games Of Thrones is so good.
 
If sex comes up at dinner on a date it seldom shows up as dessert. 
 
I think the goat of the game should get equal time to the star of the game.
 
A good programmer doesn’t need an office and in fact does most of his work outside the office which his family well knows.
 
Is it bragging if it’s true.
 
Whose in charge of counting the calories in food.
 
I’ve always been very impressed by people who can do things that I cannot.
 
The only hope you have of making money in radio is by making Management afraid you’re going to leave.
 
Sad but true, great humor comes from great pain.
 
Great radio entertainers all have the ability to observe life and comment on it in a slightly exaggerated manner.
 
Very few people believe in lobbyists but unfortunately those who do have all the power or own those who have the power.
 
Most things are invented because you are running out of something.
 
Very few things turn out better than you expected.
 
Enjoy yourself because you only experience life once. This is your first and only Rodeo.
 
The more successful you become the more you stop doing the things that made you successful.
 
The only interesting interviews are the ones where the person being interviewed doesn’t want to be. 
 
Good radio is simply a slightly exaggerated reflection of life.
 
Have you ever heard a woman brag that she got lucky last night.
 
The only young people you see driving Mercedes are usually blonde females.
 
Most successful talent is flamboyant in nature.
 
Hope is the best thing a PD can bring to an air talent.
 
Radio’s biggest enemy is the off button.
 
You don’t need brains to buy a radio station, just money.
 
Sadly a strong bond between two men is easily broken by one woman.
 
 
 
 

YOU’RE UNDER ARREST!

485561_10151919013619307_247391053_n-1Rich Stevens who is a talk show host at 8-50 WFTL in Ft. Lauderdale told me that when he was driving  home on I 95 the other day and was getting off at his Boca exit he noticed two police cars behind him. As he continued to make his exit both police cars followed him and when they put on their flashing lights and burped their sirens he pulled of the road and stopped. Both police cars pulled in right behind him with lights still flashing so knowing the drill he put both his hands on his steering wheel where they could be seen. Then he heard the loud speaker say … Please exit the car and expecting to be asked for the usual paper work he brought it all with him and faced his car as he put his hands on the roof wondering what the hell he had done wrong. The first officer who approached him told him that there would be no need for that and that the only reason they stopped him was to shake his hand and thank him for all his support on the radio and with that they presented him with his own police shield. The only problem I see with all of this is Rich is the kinda guy who will now go around and arrest people.

My Daughter Cami told me that she learned in class that when asked to write down 5 characteristics about themselves whites are less likely to write down white whereas others usually begin with their race or color.

Speaking of Cami she came home from college for the first time this weekend and I when I asked her if anything seemed different she said … Nobody is here, they’re all away at college.

OK we tried the system where the company is always right which seems to be working for very few so maybe it’s time to try the people are always right just to see what happens.

How is it that women who have borderline personality or are bipolar manage to keep it together until you tell them you love them.

The reason people talk behind your back is because they are pissed they are back there.

If you think that your goal is reachable it’s too small.

Most people are fairly smart until they fall in love.

The only men you see in Malls are married.

So now that Drew Brees and his coach took all the money what are the odds that you’ll even see the Saints in the playoffs this year let alone the Superbowl. What say you Reid Reker?

The only way to achieve the impossible is by doing the impossible.

Challenges can be seen as stumbling blocks or stepping stones, it’s your choice.

Are pro athletes told to coast when they are leading.

How much is electric going to cost once we go “all electric”.

Did you ever notice how much better a radio station sounds after you notice it’s in the top 3.

A lot of women go through a “bad girl” phase and you can only hope you’re nearby when it happens.

Women are still a mystery to me but Mr. Businessman sure ain’t.

Is the reason there are no tapes of great radio stations floating around anymore because there’s no tape or no great radio stations.

I remember a time when there was “O” tolerance for dead air but research must have proved that the folks like it because I hear it all the time now.

I was once told we all heal ourselves and the only reason to get a Doctor is because we need a good assistant.

Who is it that decides how a word should be spelled.

Have you noticed that as you get a little bit older you also get a little more bitter. I must be ancient ’cause I’m pissed all the time now.

Most e mail addresses are much too cute to remember.

A lot of people prepare for the worst of times, very few prepare for the best.

There are no rewards or punishments just consequences.

I love all the things money can buy, not the money.

Education is what determines your standing in society’s pecking order.

Once everything is safe and all is well with the world … What then?

Your freedom ends at the tip of my nose.

 

FOMO

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I met Kevin Metheny in the late 70’s when Jack McCoy told me that I should come out to San Diego and talk to this kid who just beat KCBQ with a radio station you can barely hear by doing something new called Music Research.
I flew out to San Diego the next day and not only did Kev talk me into doing Music Research he also talked me into standing with him in this huge line which wrapped around a movie theatre to see something called Star Wars. What else could I do but I talk him into moving to Philadelphia to help convert WIBG to Wizard 100 (WZZD) and also set up his Music Research system at all of the Fairbanks stations.
A little known fact is that “Pig Vomit” in the Howard Stern movie was actually a combination of 2 people, Kevin and GM John Hayes. RIP Brother.
 
The only person strong enough to stop you from succeeding is you.
 
It takes a lot of courage to speak up but it takes even more to listen.
 
Remembering what you received is a lot more important than recalling what you gave.
 
There is no sense giving advice because wise men don’t need it and fools don’t take it.
 
In life change just happens, in business you’ve gotta make it happen.
 
True Art should always make you feel a little uncomfortable.
 
The real reason people check their phones so often is called FOMO the “Feeling Of Missing Out.”
 
What if the cell phone was invented after the Internet.
 
The first time a man ever thinks about women’s rights is when he has a Daughter.
 
If you can’t be a good man then you’ll just have to be the kind of man that Mothers warn their Daughters about.
 
Talent always does best when it does what it wants to do.
 
Most people hate their jobs that’s why they have to be paid to do them.
 
Do you ever get that feeling when things are going well that you may have overlooked something. 
 
If you want to silence an over talkative woman, simply bring up sex.
 
Delilah once told me that women always know when another woman got lucky and how many times.
 
Florida is the only state where you have to drive a way up North to get to the deep South.
 
Only men tolerate nasty women.
 
I agree we have to support our troops but we definitely don’t have to support the people who send them in to do battle.
 
The client isn’t always right but it serves us well not to mention it.
 
The Ratings Gods always smile on the folks who pay for the survey.
 
When you fix fear and ego together you have a lethal weapon.
 
If the Mother Of Invention is necessity then Greed must be it’s Father.
 
I think if Government employees had to live off of tips, they would all starve to death.
 
Intelligent People Reasonably Informed Seldom Disagree.
 
If you want better ratings simply substitute You for I.
 
When I was a kid all guys I hung out with only had minor differences but it turns out that those minor differences were who they really were.
 
Frank said there are only two types of shoes, black and brown, lose the brown at 6.