Harry Calls Bullshit!

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I have the honor of presenting Ron Chapman in Chicago Saturday Nov.10th as he is inducted into The Radio Hall Of Fame along with Howard Stern and Gary Burbank.

Speaking of Ron he recently observed that it doesn’t matter if you are Hillary Clinton, Paul Ryan, Michael Bloomberg or Alex Trebek we all feel like idiots when we walk into an Apple store.

Does anybody know why our government wants us to hug Muslims. I for one sure don’t need their oil because my mother country Canada has more than we could all ever use. Is there some special redeeming quality about them I’m missing?

We are doing a new type of Talk Radio here in South Florida on Big Talk 8-50. Early mornings we are “All News” with a South Florida slant. Next up live is Joyce Kaufman who is kinda the female Michael Savage who always has our parking lot filled with TV trucks because of her outrageous statements. Joyce is also very dangerous because she also has ability to get people elected even though PPM doesn’t like her. Rich Stevens follows her with an entirely different life style approach based on the front page of the newspaper. He is followed by our afternoon drive guy Paul Barsky whom I can only describe as being seriously funny. The best part is they are all live and local.

If I am flirting with you while making suggestive remarks I’m actually not hitting on you. In fact it’s probably the opposite and I’m trying to keep you at arms length because I am smart enough to know most Women don’t really like that kind of approach. Now if I’m not making suggestive remarks and flirting with you than I am probably actually hitting on you. Consider yourself warned(-: Wouldn’t a shrink have fun with all of this.

We don’t meet people accidentally, there is a reason for everything.

I think the only point that Chick- fil- A may have been making was “If you want to eat chicken it all starts with a Rooster and a Hen”

The Hunny Bunny claims that age is just a number so because of my occasional behavior and attitude she recently assigned me the number 20.

I have never heard Women talking about a big package being really important. But I have heard them talk a lot about what a huge turn on a big wallet is.

I just read this statement … “Hey Las Vegas Your Slogan Is Bullshit” – Prince Harry.

I remember hangin’ with Jack McCoy once when the pretty Woman he was with asked him how come he didn’t date Women his age. He responded with … Because they need naps! I’m not sure what my excuse is.

As I write this I am watching tropical storm Isaac become a Hurricane and head for New Orleans as quickly as it can to celebrate the anniversary of Katrina.

Candis claimed I had ill prepared her for the real world because when she finally got into it she soon discovered she wasn’t nearly as precious as I had led her to believe.

Speaking of the above Candis hoped I wasn’t doing the same thing to Cami. I responded with … Huh?

Not that I have that much experience but I do know intelligent Women make much better lovers.

Went to see Expendables 2 last night and when I walked out there was a brand new Ferrari Rag Top parked up front where it belonged. It reminded me of the time in the late 70’s when our V/P Of Sales for Fairbanks Dick Yancey bought one. At the time WIBC/WNAP were just tearing up Indy so our parking was filled mostly with Caddies, Lincolns and Corvettes. When Dick showed up in his new Ferrari it caused quite a stir so we all left the building to look at it including Lou Palmer. Lou was our afternoon News Anchor who was also a sports car aficionado and one of the voices of the Indy 500. He took one look at it and said … But Dick it’s blue! With that he turned on his heel and went back into the building.

YOU’RE SO F**KED !

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I recently discovered that even though I can remember Kindergarten plus 1st and 2nd grade I have absolutely no memory of the 3rd or 4th grades. It was during this time my Sister Sandra had died at the age of 4 from Measles. The only thing I can figure out is my brain must have erased the entire period from my memory but I still remember her vividly and fondly. What I remember about her the most is she was the first female to have me completely wrapped around her little finger.
My Mother never got over losing her which I can totally understand because I can’t even comprehend losing my Daughters Candis or Cami. It is so not supposed to happen that there is not even a word like Widow or Orphan to describe it. During her last few days on Earth my Mother was actually very happy because she was finally going to see Sandra again.

Watching the Olympics reminded me again about why I like America more than Britain even though I was born and grew up in Canada which of course has a strong ties to Britain. The reason I say that is because it’s pretty safe to assume that if you’re born in England you don’t have any shot growing up to be King/Queen unlike in America. Right Obama!

When you are in love with an Artist get used to always being in 2nd place because thats the only way it works.

Have you ever noticed you see very few Women in Clubs or Bars who are in there 30’s but see tons of 20 and 40 year olds.

The thing to do when you get famous is get that famous name of yours on other products as quickly as possible and make some real money.

George Martin never made any money producing The Beatles. He made all his money later because he in fact had produced The Beatles.

Wow 35 years ago Elvis died but 22 years before that he changed my life.

I always advise talent not to let what they were being paid have any effect at all on how they entertain their audience. If the Radio Station they are currently working for isn’t paying them enough the next one will but only if they sound great no matter what.

Sales folks don’t work for the Radio Station they work for the client. Their goal is to get their clients the very best deal they possibly can from the Radio Station. The Air talent also doesn’t work for the Radio Station they work for the audience and their job is to entertain them and protect them from the sales folks.

Survivors never get a chance at being in charge of anything.

Experts are people who have stopped learning.

I read somewhere that 50% of Americans work for a living and the other half vote for a living.

Change is a very difficult thing to do and so it’s not very popular but if change wasn’t absolutely necessary there would be no butterfly’s

The difference between Love Ya and I love You is night and day !

I only know two young ladies who are wiser than their years and I love them both.

I cant believe the guy who talked me into blogging, Larry Shannon just recently passed away. He told me he thought a lot of people would love to read what I thought about radio and stuff every week. I’m not sure you were right Larry but I’m still at it. Thanks for demanding it and RIP.

Do you think there are any Hitlers listed in the Berlin phone book.

At a recent concert that Cami graciously allowed me to attend with her Jason Mraz apologized for the language he was going to use in a song he had written and was was about to sing. The language he claimed may sound bad was not intended bad. In fact it was the only language he said that completely conveyed the joy and emotion he had intended for the song. The tune was called “You F**king Get It”
I was thinking he may be on to something and maybe we need to use more swear words in all our documents instead of the more legalese we seem to be slipping into. Swear words come right to the point and are crystal clear. We all know exactly what was intended. Swear words also eliminate a ton of those unnecessary words lawyers cram into all the docs. For example if someone were to buy a business from you and one of your requirements to complete the deal was the buyer had to put down a percentage of the purchase price as a deposit with the rest being due on a specific date. All you would have to add to the contract to make everything perfectly clear is … And if you don’t show up on the specified date with the rest of the cash ” YOU’RE SO F**KED ” What part of that statement don’t you think they would understand.

I think it is a lot easier to program the music on a Radio Station if you personally don’t like it.

I Think I Have A Thinking Problem!!

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Laura is one of those very special Women who can make a $20.00 dress look like a Million bucks (see picture)

The bad news so far this month is I lost two women one was pretty the other beautiful. The good news is the pretty one is still gone and the better news is the beautiful one came back. But as I have learned when something seems to be too good to be true it usually isn’t.(see picture)

I cant figure out why being for everything is OK but you being against something makes some people crazy.

If liberal radio doesn’t work why does anybody think liberal TV does.

I’ve been way over thinking things lately which makes me think I may have a thinking problem.

When I tell the time to Cami I keep forgetting she has no idea what a quarter to 5 means. That’s the real generation gap!

My Father told me … If you use my money to buy clothes with you’ll buy the clothes I want you to wear. He also said while you’re living in my house I have a few rules I will need you to follow with no exceptions. First thing I did was get a part time job, there was no way I was going to school wearing the clothes my Father chose for me to wear. It was great motivation for me and I’ve been working ever since. The only thing I changed was I finally found some work I like to do.

I am very trustworthy and loyal until I am taken for granted or lied to.

It is so much easier to piss people off than please them.

I think they should fire the long time users of food stamps and give them to some new people who may appreciate them instead of giving them to the people who think they are entitled to them.

Do any Tropical Storms or Hurricanes ever miss Cuba.

Taking a chance with your life is very scary thing but regretting you didn’t is even scarier.

I wonder what’s more important what Mitt does with his money or what Obama does with mine?

If you don’t ask for excellence I guarantee you wont get it.

Marvin Hamlisch recently passed away and I remembered meeting him once at the studios of KKOB in Albuquerque. In a meeting I was attending the promotion person was telling us all that Marvin was going to be coming around in the early morning to do an interview promoting his upcoming concert. He would of course be going to all the radio stations but his first stop was to be KKOB. I broke into conversation by saying nobody wants to hear him talk and you couldn’t sell a ticket if he decided to talk instead of play at his concert. The GM instantly said to me … So what would you do smart ass! I told him I would put a piano in the studio with a mic on it. The GM said you cant ask a great artist like Marvin Hamlisch to play for free on the radio. Of course you can’t I said but I guarantee he will play without us having to ask. The GM said I’m calling you on this one and the next morning when Marvin walked into the studio there was a brand new piano sitting there waiting. Marvin immediately said to the morning man … May I sit at the piano I feel most comfortable there. He had a blast all morning, he played the news intro, the weather intro, take me out to the ball game under the sports and of course all of his hits. He had such a good time he forgot to go to the rest of the Radio Stations in town. It was one of the finest shows I have ever heard on radio, thank you Marvin R.I.P

Big Dick!

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27 years ago my Brother Reg and I bought WMET in Chicago for around 12 million dollars. Unfortunately we only owned it for about 30 minutes. We suspected the money guys weren’t going to show at the closing so our CFO Bill Yde had other buyers standing by and we spun it. It would have been fun though to take a run at Chi Town which I think is one of the toughest markets in America to conquer. The only neat thing about the whole affair now is we still have the bragging rights. Hey I don’t know any other Brothers from Transcona who owned a Radio Station in Chicago including the very successful Barone Brothers Tony and Ermanno.

Most Adults are amazed by magical tricks where as children are only amused by them because they of course believe in Magic.

Another thing I am amazed by is the fact that 3 guys threw themselves in front of their girlfriends at the Batman Massacre in Colorado saving them but giving up their own lives. Most men do this without thinking because we instinctively protect the Women we love. For some reason I never hear this mentioned as one of the few good things about Men. Surely it’s not just expected!

Most of the good moves I have ever made in my career were suggested to me by other people and just kinda fell in my lap. Most of the things I have ever chased never came true including Women.

I think I have a serious thinking problem.

The thing I am most thankful for is that all the folks who were my friends in High School are still my friends along with a lot of great people I have met on this journey.

When Radio starts firing sales folks you know we are living in a new era where the cheese has definitely moved.

Bobby Cole told me a long time ago that Diplomacy is the art of letting other people have your way.

Is it still called cuddling when you are holding a beautiful Woman in your arms even though you are just trying to prevent her from getting away.

Most companies aren’t really looking for whose fault anything is they’re really looking for someone convenient to blame and I see him coming now.

Money can’t buy you happiness but it will buy you a little time to figure out what will make you happy.

Do not bother to argue with an idiot I guarantee you he’s a hell of a lot better at it than you.

The strange thing about Men is even though they may be fat and bald they still do it with swagger!

People are upset at Chick-Fil A for their anti Gay position and want to boycott them plus try to force the government deny them permits to build new stores etc. I wonder what plans these same people have for OPEC, those folks actually kill “Gay” people.

I have always heard that Women are better at multi tasking then Men. If thats true how come Men can keep several Women happy while handling their careers but few woman can keep one Man happy while handling theirs.

I think when you add the word Big to something somehow it turns ugly, greedy, and self centered. For example … Big Business, Big Government, Big Unions, Big Bank, Big Leagues, Big Ego, Big Man, Big Money, Big Star, Big House, Big Time, Big Dick, Big Trust Fund, Big Off Shore Account, Big Hill To Climb, Big Drama, Big Deal, Big Wheel, etc.

Just because we didn’t mention it doesn’t necessarily mean we didn’t notice it.

Have you ever noticed that normal people aren’t very interesting.

Why are all the Planets perfectly round.

I keep getting these E Mail messages saying that they are shipping me all these free Dell Laptops. What the hell am I supposed to do with them all. Maybe I’ll send them as a gift to Sir Edwards or what ever his name is that wants to send me a Million Pounds from some long lost relative in England soon as I send him my bank account number.

Most Women will admit to having 5 affairs anything above that according to them is entering the slut zone so their memories go bad.

Back when I was a kid my first 3 lovers were Virgins but I don’t remember them being memorable occasions.

Usually the way it works is you write a book then hopefully they make a movie out of it. The way Dave Fulton is doing it is first he made the film “Naptown Rock Radio Wars” now he’s writing the book. But then again Hoosiers have always been a little strange.

Football is upon us! All is well in the land.