Bat Shit Crazy. (new for August 03/15)

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Watching the Indy 500 on TV recently I was reminded of a promotion we ran back at WIBC called “The Impossible Contest”. We offered ten thousand dollars to the 1st person who could correctly predict the starting position of the 33 drivers who qualified for the race.
Entries were limited to one per person and had to be received at the radio station by midnight the day before qualification day. During the whole month of May we kept claiming on air that it was “Impossible” and couldn’t be done but we got 70, 000 entries anyway. There as predicted was no winner so the following year we upped the ante a bit and changed the name to “The Possible Contest”. In this one the person who came the closest to predicting the starting line got the $10,000 and a new car. We received half the amount of entries.
 
Speaking of promotions, one of the biggest I was ever involved in was Jack McCoy’s “The Last Contest”. Here’s a taste.
 
OTHER THOUGHTS ABOUT OTHER THINGS…
 
I love the saying … The future starts now, but in truth it actually doesn’t start until tomorrow so you might as well relax and have another beer.
 
You never hear winners say “hey man no worries it’s only a game”.
 
Unfortunately there are no new sins.
 
Is bat shit crazy as crazy as it gets or is there another level.
 
The two things that produce the biggest results in radio still remain the toughest to get radio folks to do … Cold Calls & Show Prep.
 
With FM Radio we all start with the same deck of cards, it’s how you play them that makes all the difference.
 
Have you ever noticed that the traffic reports on radio are always about somewhere else.
 
The toughest job a PD has is looking confident the day before the ratings come out.
 
Doing the “Do” is what makes you excellent.
 
Nothing intimidates a man with a gun.
 
Ya gotta wonder if the folks who talk on the radio use that same radio speak in the drive thru at McDonald’s.
 
Sometimes just wasting time is time well spent.
 
We are presently overwhelmed by choices.
 
The trouble with fitting in is obvious, you never stand out.
 
There is no athlete bigger than the game but there has been a few that have changed it.
 
Is tech the new Wall Street bubble.
 
Becoming famous is almost impossible to get done but unfaming yourself is even harder. 
 
After watching 5 seasons of HBO’s “The Wire” I learned that the police care mostly about their pensions and OT.
 
Speaking of overtime I think it makes more sense to hire more police and pay none.
 
When you start talking differently your future starts look a whole lot different.
 
I used to really like Allen Iverson until I recently watched a documentary about him and discovered how quickly he forgave himself for his troubled life.
 
Just because we’re quiet when you’re talking doesn’t necessarily mean we are actually listening.
 
California may run out of water before they’ll ever run out of oil.
 
You’ll never know real fear until you become a parent.
 
Most Doctors didn’t graduate anywhere near the top of their class.
 
If it’s important enough to ya you’ll find away, if not you’ll find an excuse.
 
Can anybody explain why the Rock & Roll Hall Of Fame induction isn’t held in Cleveland.
 
Much Much More @ GeorgeJohns.com, On Twitter @GeoOfTheRadio.
 
 

 

THE SECRET FORMULA. (new july 27/15)

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I’m presently in the middle of watching a great series on HBO called “The Wire” which is about drug busts in Baltimore and ran from 2002 – 2008.
In this particular memorable scene black Commander of the Police Department is walking a white Council member through a not so nice black community where he stops and points to a run down building. He says that back in the day a lotta white folks used to also live in this neighborhood and that used to be a “white only”funeral home but as more and more blacks moved into the community and the whites started moving out I asked the owner if he was considering burying black people now. He told me that he was as long as he could bury them all at the same time and with that the Commander roared out with laughter and said … I just loved that guy. The horrified Councilman asked why considering how racist he was and the Commander said it was because he knew exactly where the man stood at all times so they got to talk about it.

Watching “The Wire” is actually quite difficult because most of the script is Ghetto Talk and is very hard to understand. I had to laugh at one point though because even the hip black detectives who were monitoring all the dealers phones had to hire an outside black lady to interpret what they were saying.

SOME OTHER THOUGHTS THAT MAY BE WORTH THINKING ABOUT…
 
If we actually took advantage of all our gifts we would be unstoppable.
 
Startling realizations…
 
Kids today consider every tune recorded before 2010 an oldie.
Teenagers growing up in the early 2000’s listening to the Backstreet Boys and Britney Spears are now in their 20’s.
Folks who grew up in the 90’s listening to Nirvana and the Foo Fighters are now in their 30’s.
The young people who were listening to Barry White and Gloria Gaynor while growing up in the 80’s are now in their 40’s.
The kids who grew up in the 70’s listening to Elton John, James Taylor and Creedence on the radio are now in their 50’s.
The teenagers who grew up listening to The Beatles, Stones and Motown in the 60’s are they themselves in their 60’s.
The folks who discovered Rock&Roll in the 50’s and first heard Elvis and Chuck Berry on the radio are now in their 70’s
The people who loved the Great American Songbook with Frank, Tony, and Ella in the 40’s are now well into their 80’s.
 
It’s a complete waste of time looking for shortcuts to any place worth going to.
 
Why is it that when you finally have a beautiful woman by your side is the only time other women seem to want you.
 
I have studied the phenomenon called women for a long long time and I’m proud to say that I know more about them than most men. When I think back about all the things I have learned about them is when I realize I’ve still got a long way to go because I know almost nothing at all about them. 
 
I think it may have finally stopped snowing in my hometown of Transcona where the only way to got through those cold winter nights was with a two four, a two six, and two tarts.
 
If you need to be a Super Star here is the secret formula … T + S = A + (p + i + t + e e) x P + I = $
 
Art is only created when Talent and Science are in perfect harmony.
 
When you put the perfect concept together with great understandable philosophy you’re about half done and have arrived at the hard part. The implementation.
 
When you’re the radio station most folks go to when they see a funnel cloud in the distance you’ll always do fairly well.
 
When you launch a new format and the “radio people” get it right away, it’s generally not that good.
 
The first time I ever heard about any trade the radio station may have had was when I got a memo or e mail advising me not to use it anymore.
 
Why do all new GMs need a new logo and a client party to fix the tarnished image of the radio station.
 
I think there should be a celebration when the radio station is sold out rather than the chaos intensity it seems to create.
 
My response to an angry sales rep when I’m told that we were the only station in town that rejected their client’s spot has always been … I know, isn’t that great. 
 
What ever happened to the “Satellite Is Gonna Kill Radio” thing the NAB spent millions fighting.
 
The business of radio used to be so simple, just bring in more money than you spent. I have no idea how it works now because they don’t spend anything.
 
Ya gotta wonder like I do if the people on the radio use that same approach when talking into the speaker at the McDonalds drive thru.
 
I think a comedian may be nothing more than just a person who remembers jokes.
 
The only advice anyone will ever heed is the advice they asked for.
 
What would your buddies say if they could hear the way you talk to your lady in private.
 
Isn’t it strange how much we rebelled when we were kids but turned out a lot like our folks anyhow.
 
I believe Columbus started the whole illegal alien mess we’re in today.
 
We are actually born selfish so we have to learn how to share which is not an easy task as any rich man will tell you.
 
The four topics men love the most and have all day to talk about them are…
1. Sex
2. Sports
3. Career
4. Sex
 
The people who do most of the bitching represent about 73% of the population but unfortunately most of them neither have the attitude nor aptitude to fix anything nor are they capable of recruiting anyone who does because they were born followers.

What was it we were so happy about in all the pictures we’re in.

Much much more @ GeorgeJohns.com and on Twitter @GeoOfTheRadio. 

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The Truth. (new for may25/2015)

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Shortly after leaving Indianapolis for California I began running so I could get in a little exercise, but as I am want to do I soon became obsessed with it and even hired Thom Hunt an Elite runner to coach me. Almost ten years later I returned to Indy for the mini-marathon which finished up on the world famous Indy 500 track which was the reason that I wanted to do the race but unfortunately it was hot and humid when we left Monument Circle.
My pace ended up being much too fast for the conditions mostly because I was so excited about running on the track that I was too anxious and by the time I got there, I was beat. As I ran through the entrance and up onto the track it loomed a lot larger than I ever remember it but I knew it only took an Indy race car about 40 seconds to get around the 2 1/2 mile oval so I just put my head down and pushed on. After about what seemed like a 1/2 an hour or so later I looked up only to discovered that the first turn didn’t seem to have gotten any closer so my love for the track began to fade at that moment. God speed Gentlemen.

I think I may need to listen a little closer to the lyrics of the tune “Red Red Wine” and consider maybe cutting back a little on my wine consumption. I took a nap the other day and when I awoke I panicked because not only didn’t I remember what I did with my car I couldn’t even remember where I had been last night. Then suddenly it hit me … This was last night!

ENOUGH ABOUT ME HERE ARE SOME ABSTRACT THOUGHTS ABOUT OTHER STUFF I’VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT…

The most fun you’ll ever have is when you start pursuing and learning the truth.

Just to put it all into perspective … Dave’s last show was watched by 13.76 million, 14.6 million watched Jay’s final appearance and Johnny went out with a whopping 50 million.

The only thing the current radio leaders haven’t figured out how to do is get out of a contract cheap, but maybe it’s self serving because they don’t want anybody figuring out how to get out of theirs.

I haven’t heard the word “genius” used to describe anybody in radio for a long long time.

The two things you need to be a great entertainer is Passion & Imagination. They’ll also make you a better lover.

Walt Disney used a management style of bottom up where as radio uses top down. I’m pretty sure Walt’s way produced a hell of a lot more.

The only song I’ve ever heard about Mr. Business Man was a funny little ditty poking fun at him by Ray Stevens.

My friend Bob Christy pointed out to me that in all the Science Fiction movies the evil people in the future are always some corporation not the government.

There’s really only two tempos of music, it’s up or it’s not.

If you want a career in showbiz and you’re not very talented you better get famous.

Most people at a radio station think their part is the biggest part. That’s why things move so slowly because they are waiting for  you to come to your senses.

The best thing about having experienced being #1 is that hopefully you’ll recognize when it starts happening again and stop f**king with it.

Sometime the only way to figure out how to win is by losing.

Jim Hilliard once told me that even a bad plan if well executed has a pretty good shot at succeeding. 

No matter how wonderful you think your radio station sounds a sales person can soon straighten you out.

The very best thing about advertising is it kills bad products.

The only good shows I’ve ever heard on the radio were the ones that produced a great promo.

The only thing a listener remembers about a radio station is its inconsistencies so I would advise that they be good so your listeners have good memories. 

Sales people are what we call “fair weather listeners” they knew all along that the station was hot once the new numbers come out.

A crisp one hundred dollar bill wrapped around a commercial does not in any way change the sound of that commercial.

After having dinner with Cami and her friends my daughter later told me … Daddy you’re weird but that’s OK because that’s what my friends love about you.

Only family can give you unconditional love, listeners at best only have very conditional love for you. 

I read a great sign while driving by a church the other day “honk if you love Jesus, text if you wanna meet him”.

A lot of text messages just look mean even though they may have been intended as words of love.

When was the last time a woman ever was seduced.

Hearing from a woman that she desires me is much more thrilling than the actual love making. Just saying! 

It’s not getting through the tough times that defines who you are, it’s how you got through them.

Getting on the scale and sucking your stomach in is the very definition of one being self delusional.

A question for Jim Hilliard Jr. Little Jim which do you like better, the Stones in the 60’s or the Stones in their 70’s.

Great finish for the Indy 500, Jaun Montoya wins his 2nd.

Much more @ GeorgeJohns.com and on Twitter @GeoOfTheRadio.

 
 

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SUGAR. (new for July 20/15)

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I remember once listening to an interview with Frank Zappa where he was talking about driving through Hollywood on the way to a meeting with his record company in Burbank when he had to stop for a red light.
Sitting there with the top down enjoying the California sunshine while singing along with the radio he noticed that the couple in the next car were staring at him horrified. Frank suddenly realized that he’d been singing along rather loudly to “Sugar Sugar” by the Archies.
 

OTHER ABSTRACT THOUGHTS ABOUT A LOT OF OTHER THINGS…

It must be amazing when the type of music you do isn’t what’s popular today but because you’re so talented you change the whole game. 

When I told Joe Amaturo that I finished school at the Manitoba Institute Of Technology he told me that I needed to shorten it up to MIT.

The automobile is as old as radio but somehow they are still pretty cool where as radio isn’t. How did they manage that do you suppose.

Most people appear to be pretty smart on an e mail, text, or private message, that’s why the Millenniums don’t use the phone, too much pressure.

I came to the scary realization recently that any tunes recorded in 2010 or before are oldies to my daughter Cami.

There is no sales department nor a system strong enough to sell a radio station that no one listens to.

It’s better to be awful on the radio than it is to be boring.

All radio stations eventually end up sounding like their PD. How cool is yours huh! 

Have you ever noticed that the people who have never ever been funny end up on the radio telling jokes.

Jim Hilliard used to say that we didn’t have a license to bore.

If the folks who live in America had to pay to listen to radio what % do you think would. Right now about 90% do each week but I’m thinking it’s because it’s free not because it’s good.

I’ve heard the term sales friendly used in many sales meetings but I’ve yet to hear programming friendly used at a sales meeting.

America always had a way too many choices except when it comes to presidential candidates.

As long as your company has a lot of income you can f**k with the books and make them say pretty well anything you want them to say. But If you don’t a lotta income and you’re still making the books sing your tune … It’s jail time baby!

If you take into account how much time is spent and how many people from all the charities and government agencies are involved with helping the poor you start to realize that the poor are a huge industry.

Success in radio and most of the rest of showbiz comes down to having a fan base.

Success is based on an equal partnership between Attitude & Ability. 

The music biz has always been a step or two behind the consumers needs.

Most times the simplest of solutions is the best.

You never hear about bad mothers only bad fathers, surely there must have been a couple.

I feel sorry for daughters whose Mom is not their best friend now that they are grown.

No women is ever gonna offer up naughty talk or erotic photos, for that you’re gonna have to learn how to beg.

A B-25 Bomber crashed into the 76th floor of the Empire State building on July 28th 1945 and it never collapsed. Hmmmmm.

Sometimes you’re so busy working on and planning our future that you forgot to live your life and before you know it there you are stuck in the future with no plan.

The only people who will ever tell you the real truth about yourself are your angry enemies.

It’s hard to blend in when you kinda stand out.

It is very dangerous to play it safe.

A great writer once told me that everything written including fiction is at least 50% true. I can’t possibly keep that fact out of head as I watch all the conspiracy movies about the small group of individuals who supposedly really run the entire world which makes the whole experience a little scary.

The most over paid people on earth have to be the sound engineers at concerts and live TV music shows. Hey guys we came to watch and hear the singers not the f**king guitar players.

Recklessness created more fortunes than caution ever did.

So Mr./Miss Jenner won the ESPY for courage over a lot of other courageous people huh.

Sneak peeks @ GeorgeJohns.com and on Twitter @GeoOfTheRadio.