SOMETIMES YOU WIN BY LOSING.

 

 

Years ago the big TV station in Dallas challenged the KVIL crew to a tug a war across the Trinity River. Ron Chapman got brand new white sweatshirts for this event with giant red call letters on the front and back. Our plan was simple … We lose !  We explained to our now unhappy staff that by losing we get a lot more camera time on the evening news. Sure enough that night at least 10 minutes of the newscast was spent showing those big red call letters as we were being dragged through the mud.

Speaking of KVIL I received my most intense client call ever shortly after leaving Fairbanks Broadcasting to try my hand at consulting out of San Diego. Jim Hilliard had retained my services because he was sure I was going to starve to death. Shortly after moving to San Diego I get a call from Jim where he loudly says to me without even exchanging pleasantries … IT COST ME A MILLION DOLLARS TO GET “I HEART KVIL” BUMPER STICKERS ON MOST OF THE CARS AND TRUCKS IN DALLAS AND NOW I HEAR WE’RE GOING TO SPEND AN EXTRA TEN GRAND TO TAKE THEM ALL OFF! ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND ???

According to Jerry Del Colliano I Pod sales are tanking so I guess it’s only pro athletes who are using them now. But I do wonder if they are actually listening to anything or just avoiding questions.

As our economy continues to suck it is drastically changing America and a lot of people are starting to leave the smaller communities and move back into the city. Maybe it’s to get closer to the bars.

Even though I really didn’t quite know what I was doing at the time the biggest ratings success I ever had was in Ottawa Canada. All I did there was just tame the radio station down. The ratings went crazy but then again I was lucky enough to have a big enough cume to play with Randy.

Cami told me the other day that she noticed I had butt dialed her. Huh? (-:

Peyton Manning wants to play so bad he went to Europe last week for stem cell treatments that are not yet approved in the US

Speaking of the Colts Johnny George has decided not to shave until the Colts win. Hey Castleton Square do you have room for one more Santa.

You build your radio audience one listener at a time any attempt at more is just hype.

As perfect as some people appear to be believe me all the folks on the other side of the divorce have found some flaws.

When we elect our government we have to figure a way to get the ones who are just clowns out before four years.

I still haven’t met a woman worthy enough for me to give up my family for theirs but a lot of my friends sure have. Oh oh am I being sexist again? Damn!

I used to think that the Post Office had the worst employees behind the counter but after taking my Daughter Cami to the DMV for her drivers permit they they take no service and the word no to a new level and just kill the Post Office. If either had to make their living from tips they would all starve to death.

Speaking of government workers don’t you wish we could get rid of all of them every four years just like their big bosses.

Neil Simon said he never hired comedians to do his comedies because they were always in too much of a hurry to get to the punch line. He felt all his words deserved respect.

The consuming of too much Wine sometimes leads to a wonderful momentary feeling of freedom where like a fool you say what you’ve always wanted to say.

I love launching new radio stations because you always start with the tastiest 100 songs. The station never ever sounds that musically good ever again.

I was explaining to Scott Courant one of our radio sales guys what the difference between a commercial and a promo was. A commercial I explained is information about one of our clients, the services they offer, and how wonderful they are. A promo is information about us, our services, and how wonderful we are. So I cant run your promo because it’s not about us. He of course was looking at me like he had never heard any of this before. Our CFO Ric Hindes interrupted our conversation by stating he has always known what a promo really was … It’s simply a freebie commercial that sales doesn’t run through the normal channels.

Well Floyd Mayweather sure looked like a wimp and a coward when he threw that sucker punch last week didn’t he “Big O”. How long do you think he can keep duckin’ a real fight with Manny Pacquiao. I don’t think tricks are going to work on him.

 

YOUR RIGHTS END RIGHT AT THE TIP OF MY NOSE.

 

 

The three things I know I have in common with guys like Randy Bachman, Fred Turner, Burton Cummings and Neil Young are (1) We all grew up in Winnipeg (2) We all put records out (3) We all vividly remember hearing our records on the radio for the first time. Radio is still the only thing in the world that can provide a very magical moment like that.

Wow old friend Dennis Jon Bailey just won Radio Personality Of The Year at the NAB/RAB Radio Show in Chicago. Good for you DJB!

What if the talent were in charge of Mr. Business Man’s salary how much would they pay him do you suppose. He is worthy but he cant sing, dance, write, rhyme, act, sculpt, paint, weave, rap, design, mold, draw, perform, or make us laugh. What he does do you can learn to do at school. I’m not sure what the gifted would pay him but I’m guessing a lot less.

Bob Christy was telling me that he was listening to Willie’s Road House on Satellite radio where the host asked Waylon Jenning’s son if there was anything more country than Cowboy sleeping with his cousin he answered yeah it’s even more country if he marries her.

Your freedom of speech ends at the doors to your office building and your human rights end at the tip of my nose.

Wow the Bo-Sox finally won a game.

Bill Stovin who gave me my first PD job at CKOM in Saskatoon passed away recently and I can only hope the industry forgave him long ago.

I think some women are even more sexist than men. The type of woman I’m referring to often use strong words that if a man used when talking to another man would lead to extreme violence. Because they are women they expect to get away with it. What could be more sexist than that.

The top 5 regrets from people with very little time left to live.                                               1. I wish I’d had the courage to live like I wanted to instead of how others expected me to. 2. I wish I didn’t work so hard. 3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings. 4. I wish I would have stayed in touch with my friends. 5. I wish I had let myself be happier.

I grew up in had two cousins Ben and Irving I was close to and were all about year apart with me being the youngest. I remember always wishing to be as old as they were. I no longer wish that.

Speaking about growing up my two daughters Candis and Cami are throwing me a little Birthday Party in San Diego and have invited a few friends to what they call a “Toast & Roast” The part that has me concerned is how over excited some folks seem to be about the roasting part which includes Cami amongst them.

What’s up with the race reporters in NASCAR wearing drivers suits they almost looks as silly as Baseball Managers.

Lee Abrams said its business that makes radio rock but it’s content that makes it roll.

Warren Cosford saw a survey that pointed out who the coolest nationalities on the planet are. 1. Americans 2. Brazilians 3. Spanish 4. Italians 5. French. The not so cool Nationalities are 1. Belgians 2. Poles 3. Turks 4. Canadians 5. Germans

Venus Williams says to this day she still finds the rain very comforting. When she was a child she had to practice Tennis 5 hours a day so whenever it rained she finally got a break.

The weaker your signal the more unique your programming must be.

Laws are for Judges and Lawyers the intent of the law is what the people are interested in.

I understand the legendary Bill Gardner is about to become V/P & General Manager of a huge furniture store in Arizona. I don’t see the connection but good for him I guess.

Bad Boy Bobby Cole says the month of August is done and oh what a month it was.

 

If You Have To Explain Who You Are Then You Ain’t !

 

 

At this moment I am at 35,000 ft flying from Ft. Lauderdale to San Francisco and thinking about a few things

CNN claims it has 3000 hours of news about 911 posted. You would think that radio would have much much more, but none of it is posted. Whats up with that.

I recently got an e mail from George Francis who had been at a party in Columbia S.C. over the weekend and heard a woman raving about a morning personality she used to listen to when she lived in Dallas. She claimed he had once even put out a fire using Perrier water while wearing a Tuxedo. George thought she must be talking about Ron Chapman. Ron confirmed the story and said he had done a little grocery shopping just before attending a black tie affair. On his drive home through Highland Park he noticed a front lawn on fire. He stopped his car jumpd out and looked around for a hose, nothing. He knocked on the door, nothing. Knocked on a window also nothing. Then remembering what he had in the trunk he got out the Perrier and successfully put out the fire. If you know anything at all about Highland Park you know putting out a fire with Perrier water while wearing a Tuxedo probably didn’t look that unusual.

I heard on the Joyce Kaufman show on 8-50 WFTL that the Jews are very upset with Obama over the economy and his handling of Israel. They are threatening to make him pay in the next election which means only 70 % of them are going to vote for him instead of the usual 78 %. That just falls a little short of the death penalty doesn’t it.

Is it still racist or prejudice if it’s true.

I believe that the generation my daughter Cami is growing up in is the least racist or prejudice generation so far. But she and her friends are very aware of who the ghetto kids are and are very wary of them.

According to Ted Bolton the recording artists from the 70’s are getting ready to start touring and promoting their old records again. By law after 35 years they finally get to control and own their own music. Here come the reunion tours and greatest hits packages from the 70’s bands.

A radio station is supposed to endorse and promote their air personalities. The personalities in turn endorse and promote the radio station. I hear or see very little of either.

In Canada if you have a college education you have a leg up. In America it’s only what college you went to that counts.

The only thing good about being my age is … If anyone ever harmed either one of my daughters my retaliation would be very swift and sweet. The consequence may be spending the rest of my life in prison if my peers on the Jury would even send me there. I just look at it as just a few years of free room and board. This makes guys like me very dangerous I would think.

I have heard huge acts like Elvis, The Beatles, The Stones, The Who and U2 to mention a few thank Chuck Berry and Little Richard for making music that inspired them to make their own music. I have never heard Chuck Berry or Little Richard thank anybody for anything.

If you have to explain who you are than you really aren’t anybody so give it up and sit down.

I am a very big Brett Farve fan but the way Aaron Rogers handled all that controversy back then now makes me a very big Aaron Rogers fan also. Watching him and Drew Brees go at it Thursday night was like watching two gunfighters.

Most radio programming is aimed at people who wouldn’t be caught dead wearing a PPM device.

Talking about what the people are talking about is real real hard to do. Getting them to talk about you just takes a little talent.

When Fairbanks Broadcasting owned WVBF- FM in Boston we were a top 40 station called F-105.  The big rocker at the time was WRKO and we did everything we could to knock them off but weren’t very successful so we decided to obsolete them. We threw them a giant goodbye party. We filled our airwaves with stories about how great they used to be, and how as kids we grew up listening to them. It’s not WRKO’s fault that music sounded so much better on FM. We complained about the fact that the city fathers hadn’t even recognized WRKO for all the great things they used to do. We at F-105 feel they should be treated with the same respect as Paul Revere still gets. If city hall wasn’t going to do anything F105 feels a responsibility to a fellow broadcaster to do something. So in this spirit F-105  has decided to throw them biggest going away party Boston has ever seen. It just killed them! Years later some of the staff who were there at the time said they knew they were done. How do you go on the air and try and tell everyone you’re not going anywhere. They were demoralized and looked to management to figure out what to do. Management had nothing so the very next book they did go away.

Its a hell of a lot easier to play the hits then pick ’em and ratings only come from the playing.

The ultimate radio station is the one who can sound both background and foreground at the same time and they usually have all the money too.

Is it just me or do low power FMs really sound better than the high power ones.

LAWYERS LIE !

 

 

My Brother Reg has this new thing going which at some point will be world wide called the Local Music Wall. He is currently Beta testing it in Winnipeg and seeing as my Daughter Candis was born there some of her stuff is on the special chart. Check it out here www.localmusicwall.com/winnipeg

When Hurricane Irene was headed for Florida 8-50 WFTL jumped into complete storm coverage but when she swung west of us and headed for New York, GM Steve Lapa came up with a great concept. He got a hold of Randy Michaels and Walt Sabo and arranged to simulcast their new FM News 101.9 in New York on WFTL here in South Florida. This is probably the only place in the World where broadcasting a New York station would even come close to making any sense. Most people who live here are from and have family still living in the North East. ( try getting a ticket when the Yankees come down to South Florida to play the Marlins) The whole weekend sounded great !

The thing about marriage is you really have no choice you have to back your partner even when they’re wrong and I’m not sure that’s a good thing.

Just because somebody is too expensive doesn’t mean they’re not worth it.

Sean Ross claims the summer song of 2011 is Party Rock Anthem – LMFAO

I wonder how many people there are whose only goal is to survive.

You often hear the phrase “Over Worked and Under Paid” If you could erase one which would it be.

Rich Stevens told me he couldn’t understand why my stuff is all over the place. I guess it’s because thats how I think. But I can put a name and a story to every line plus take over an hour to tell it.

The only way a human being changes is when something very emotional happens to them. Deciding to change which takes a lot of repetition.

I think both Males and Females are having a lot of difficulty with the new order of things. Who should stay at home with the kids and who should work. The easy call says “show me the money” but mother nature may have a different call.

I was born a Wasp in Canada and I sure don’t remember that affording me any breaks. So when a person who speaks another language or is of a different color or both thinks they are owed some special rights and deserve to cut in front of me in line … Ain’t gonna happen!

In 1965 it was decided that Paul should sing Yesterday all by him self on the Ed Sullivan Show. He was a little apprehensive standing backstage waiting to go on because he had never sung before without the rest of the Beatles before. A stagehand came up and asked him if he was nervous. Not really Paul answered … Well you should be there are over 73 million people watching.

Bob Lefsetz says information is beautiful but it’s not always right.

The greatest teacher of all time still is Father Time.

Just because you love your family unconditionally doesn’t make them good people.

The best voice over demo I think I have ever heard was from The Jury’s original singer Donny Burns.

To do good radio you must study life.

I wonder if our founding Fathers would like how America turned out and would agree with the way it’s being run right now.

Bobby Cole told me that Henry Kissinger once said that the nice thing about being a celebrity is that when you bore people they think it’s their fault.

In radio like most businesses you have 3 shots at becoming something special. 1. Be First. 2. Be Best. 3. Be Different. If you can be all three I guarantee double digits.

So a CPA was explaining to me tonight that she is not allowed to lie because she could go to jail. A lawyer even in a court of law is allowed to lie. Unless you can find one other person other than a Crook, a Congressman, ( lawyer) or a Senator, (lawyer) who agrees with that then I think we should go with Shakespeare’s suggestion.

When I heard that John Lennon had said “The Beatles are just a band and Yoko’s my life” is when I knew he must have been doing some very serious drugs.

If you asked either of my daughters if they thought their Dad would cancel a dinner engagement with either of them them to dine instead with most beautiful woman in the world. I’m pretty sure they would both claim absolutely not. The sad thing is they would both be absolutely right.

Giving up your virginity is neither a breathless nor a magical moment so you may as well hang on to it for as long as you can. (Hmmm who is this one for?)