Rarely Does Chris Rock Not Rock.

Download PDF
10256532_10152868597457038_6043294456887467119_n

While being under the weather for a few days I got to watch a whole bunch of old Chris Rock HBO specials.
Chris always knocks me out but I think what I really like about his stuff is that it just doesn’t seem to be that political.
In fact the only time Chris seems to bring politics up when he wants to poke fun at all the politicians, otherwise other than Hollywood folks he is mostly into the relationships between men and women with some great insights which sneak up on you because you’re so disarmed from laughing.
The first special must have been from the Monica Lewinsky era because Chris was blaming Hillary for the scandal claiming the first lady’s first job was to be the first one on her knees whenever our President needed a BJ. He also went on to say that had she been taking care of business America would be much better off today.
The next special must have been during the George W era because Chris was talking about how everything in life was already set like if you’re in college and getting A’s, you’re gonna get to run very large corporations. Hell if you’re only getting B’s you’re still gonna get to run stuff like 7 Elevens and Mickey D’s but those of you that get C’s he went on to say will be working for those mother f##kers and you dumb f**ks who only get D’s will get to take out the trash. I get all that but what I don’t get he yells, is how the f**k does a guy who is supposed to be working for all the other mother f##kers and maybe only just taking out the trash get to run the whole f**king Country! As usual he had me on the floor laughing my ass off.
I was really looking forward to watching his next special because it was put together from his appearances all over the world where they somehow they took portions and seamlessly blended them together giving the whole special a very unusual look. He would start a rant about women wearing one suit and finish it wearing a different one and be doing it from another country.
He began by talking about just how difficult it was for a man to live with women and that even Mandela who spent 27 years of his life locked up in prison must have found that easier to do that than live with a woman because he 6 months after he got out he divorced his wife and once again I was on the floor. As I said I really like Chris Rock because he is usually all over the place and even kinda like me claims that he is Conservative about some issues and liberal about others but explains it so much better than I could by saying that he is conservative when it comes to crime but liberal when it comes to prostitution. Next he brings up Obama and I thought to myself … This should be fun I wonder what the hell he’s gonna poke him about. Well Chris didn’t poke him about anything and all of a sudden the whole show turned into a vote for Obama political rally and the only humor he used was to make fun of all the crackers who were gonna be f**ked after Obama’s elected. Can you spell B-O-R-I-N-G and color me GONE.

 

 

Send In The Troubled Ladies. (new for December 14/15)

Download PDF

1391519_10152262591074307_1940714010_n502338503

One of the biggest mistakes I ever made in radio was by not doing something.
When we first launched CFTR in Toronto one of our board ops was Rick Moranis who used to write funny lines for the air talent plus turn our staff meetings into total disarray with his off the wall humor.
Our midday guy Sandy Hoyt though had Rick’s number and merely had to walk into the room which was enough to make Rick fall to the floor howling with fits of laughter.
My big mistake back then was not being smart enough to put them on together for mornings where they would have made radio history.
 
A VARIETY OF OTHER STUFF TO THINK ABOUT…
 
Silence can be misunderstood but never misquoted.
 
I think I may be attracted to troubled women mainly because in the beginning they’re the best at not appearing troubled.
 
I laugh when when I hear that women are just looking for a sensitive man because there are none as sensitive as me and I scare most of them.
 
The saddest part about living in America is that it appears that only the middle class believe in right and wrong. The rich and poor seem to only believe in the new scam.
 
Changing jobs spouses and friends won’t change much if it’s you who needs the changing.
 
Mysterious women are always very exciting but unfortunately the mystery eventually become tiresome.
 
Women generally have about a 10 year window to find the man of their dreams.
 
In order for you to win someone must lose, helping them do that is what you must come up with.
 
Just because I don’t support all the liberal causes doesn’t make me a conservative as not supporting a bunch of conservative causes doesn’t make me a liberal. I Like most people am little bit left or a little bit right depending on the cause.
 
I wonder how many people now wish there was a little more racial profiling going on back when folks were boarding those planes on 911.  
 
I think what most Americans want is a benevolent dictator so we can stop voting for these lying fools.
 
Does it make you a little bit nervous that Vegas knows which NFL teams are gonna win and by how much even when the coaches don’t.
 
Speaking of football and numbers, Canada finally has a bigger number than the US after playing their 103rd Grey Cup. (Canadian Super Bowl) recently.
 
I’ve heard some 60 second promos on the radio that were a way too long and could have been done in 15 seconds but I’ve also heard some that should have gone on for at least another minute.
 
A nurse once explained to me that we basically heal ourselves. She claimed that when looking for a Doctor one was searching for an assistant so she advised finding a good one whom you also liked.
 
Have you ever noticed that when an artist no matter where they are from in the world use an American accent when singing in English.
 
Speaking of singing there is a huge difference between how you’re supposed to sing an English Hymn and Gospel Music
 
It’s much easier to point out what’s wrong with something than point out how to fix it.
 
Have you ever seen any movies where Big Business and/or the Government were the heroes.
 
The world you live in may in fact be only a figment of your imagination.
 
Greatest is usually accomplished by a person who is running out of time.
 
Dying is the only thing that makes life worth living.
 
I wonder what it would be like to live in a world where you weren’t allowed to lie.
 
One man walking the talk is more than equal to 50 who are just talking the talk.
 
If you want it ya gotta ask for it because seldom do nice surprises show up.
 
In order to have a future one must think about the future.
 
Just’cause I didn’t talk about it doesn’t mean I don’t know about it.
Everything exists, we just haven’t discovered it yet.

What’s the purpose of a f**k you account if you never say f**k you.

I begin celebrating the 12 Days Of Christmas by posting my twelve most read Blogs of 2015 starting Christmas day.

More at GeorgeJohns.com and on Twitter @GeoOfTheRadio
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
  
 

EARL MANN.

Download PDF

1382867_10152262610069307_2070836700_nEarl Mann and I started working together years ago at CFTR in Toronto where he was our midday guy and Ric Moranis was his board op and I’m proud to say that even today we still do some projects together. Earl possesses one of those incredible voices that you have to be born with and I can’t do any great radio without because of its natural warmth that simply says … Listen Or I Will Kill You!

CBSGAMEDAYOPEN.mp3

 

  



THUGS! (new for Nov 16/15)

Download PDF

10499606_402077239960845_6826407909004147845_o

When a very irritated Muddy Waters once asked Leonard Chess why the hell he had signed that cowboy singer from St.Louis to his R&B label.
Leonard replied that Chuck Berry didn’t sing Country, in fact was playing something brand new called Rock & Roll. He went on to warn Muddy that if he and his buddies, Little Walter, and Howlin’ Wolf didn’t start playing it soon they were gonna be back washing dishes.

OTHER OBSERVATIONS THAT POPPED INTO MY HEAD…

After 7 straight losses I wonder why Dallas puts up with two thugs like Dez Bryant and Greg Hardy who appear to be losers not winners.(3 drops by Dez while Hardy was busy yelling at team mates and fans in a loss to Tampa.)

Speaking about bad boys how come the media talks about Jameis Winston all the time but I never hear about Marcus Mariota who seems to be having a decent season.

Speaking of football I think it may be time for Peyton Manning while he still can under his own power to slowly walk off the field and out of the stadium. The hall awaits.

You may not be able to adjust the wind but you can sure adjust the sails.

The only thing our parents never taught us was how to live without them.
 
The secret to doing great radio is to sound like you’re not doing radio.
 
Radio’s biggest problem is our lack of self confidence.
 
How do people who can’t write songs end up writing critiques about the songs. 
 
Nothing changes until the owner starts suffering.
 
I believe the only people who can help the Catholic Church become more productive are non Catholics.
 
Mr. Business man has always hoped that there is another way besides product to become successful but  unfortunately very few of them get hurt for that kinda thinking because they like the poor are government protected.
 
Why are there so many laws protecting Mr. Businessman, aren’t we the ones that need protection from them.
 
Every great radio station started with a cause but I doubt very much that making the owner rich was one of them.
 
Speaking of the poor, the poorest of them all is the man who cannot dream.
 
Seeing as we are told we are the problem maybe we straight white males should stand down and let the noisy people have at it.
 
Are their any laws that benefit men only.
 
How come the Chinese who are as powerful as we are don’t seem to have the same need to dictate their way of life to other countries as much as we do.
 
The longer you take to do something the better it needs to turn out.
 
I can’t believe how much things have gone up. When I was a young lad you could buy a nice brand new car for 5 grand now they’re 30. My Grandson nathaniel is learning to play music on a thousand dollar violin whereas back in the day I was cutting records with my fine Fender Strat which cost me $473.00.
 
I always end up doing only what I want to do so if you think you conned me I actually conned you.
 
I love when the ladies work you but I hate it when they think we don’t know.
 
Women love to share everything but their money.
 
If women spent as much time taking care of their body’s as they do their hair they would need armed escorts.
 
To be smart one must study, to be wise one must live.
 
I think therefore I am but I’m probably not who I think I am.
 
Being in love does not in any way change how wonderful a 20 year old looks.
 
Speaking of good lookin’ do you remember how beautiful those girls who called the hit lines sounded. NOT!
 
You already know that you should leave when you’re in a bad relationship so it’s what else you’ve got that we’re looking for.
 
Fame quickly unveils who you were all along.
 
Management from the top down always fires from the bottom up.
 
Have you ever noticed that whenever you need a solution to a problem you tend to look up.
 
For some reason I write with a pen using my left hand but I write my Blog on my laptop with my right hand.
 
If they deregulated sports like they’ve done everything else would we even watch.
 
What type of person do you suppose would ever wear a PPM device.
 
Young and old will listen to the young but only the old listen to the old.
 
Allen Toussaint who passed away this week didn’t think he was at all special let alone overrate himself as Kayne West and others do.

I just found out that one of the few gentlemen in broadcasting Ed Shadek recently passed away. I had the honor and a privilege of working for Ed in San Diego when I first began my consulting career.

Much more @ George Johns.com. On Twitter @GeoOfTheRadio
 

 

 

You’re My Inspiration Baby – Brent Farris.

Download PDF

10678506_10153132939284307_3784519486475167515_n

George, your quote in one of your recent Blogs was, “As easy as this sounds it’s not done on most radio stations … Simply do more of what people like and less of what they don’t like.” Reading your quote got me thinking about what radio people believe the listeners really like to hear on the radio, so I asked!

Sales – “Most people like live remotes.

PD’s – “Most people like great slogans like … Today’s Hits & Yesterday’s Favorites.

Jocks “Most people Like it when I TALK MORE.. and repeat my name so they can write it down.”

Sales Managers – “Most people Like 12 spots in a row and of course​ live remotes.”

Music Directors – “Most people only like songs that test well but of course we only test the songs we like so it turns out well for everyone.”

Owners – 
“Most people Like it when we say the company name in the top of the hour ID with passion.​”

Traffic Reporters –  “Most people Like  it when I tell them​ there’s no traffic and then begin to chit chat with the morning team with some funny stuff that just popped into my head.​”

Weather ​F​orecasters – “Most people Like lots and lots of detail and cool weather words like barometric pressure and all the stuff that only pilots understand but make me sound smarter than them.​”

Production​ Guys – “Most people like lots of Zaps, Booms and Zips between all the words.”

Consultants – “Most people Like what I tell you they like.” Promotion People – “Most people like ticket give aways and more ticket give aways​, what they want are tickets.. and if they​ can WIN EM  before you can buy em … It’s orgasm time baby!”

The all​night guy – “Most people like it when the morning guy is sick and I finally get the chance to fill in for him and do all the stuff I’ve been saving for this very moment.”

News People – “Most people Like politics and more​ politics’s with a little​ sports thrown in to use as a buffer”.

The Engineer – “Most people like.​.. I don’t care what most people like.. I am really busy.. don’t talk to me.. aren’t you gone yet?”

General Managers – “Most people like voice trackers they’re so efficient and work so much cheaper … I mean they are soo professional, and ​oh yeah the folks also like 12 spots in a row.”

Researchers – “Most people really Like NUMBERS.. They just love numbers a​n​d even like them more when I explain what the numbers may or may not mean​.”

Listeners – “Most people know what they like and like what they know but I have no Idea what that is because I only like what I like which changes every single day.. good luck “

Brent.