What Was Hitler’s Mom Like?

thI met Jeff ‘n’ Jer for the first time shortly after their arrival in San Diego where hey were about to become the new morning duo at Y95. I was retained by their Program Director Pam Finn who wanted me to help them figure out how they could get their arms around America’s finest city and marry it as quickly as possible.
Upon my arrival at the station for my first meeting I was pleasantly surprised to discover that Pam wasn’t the only beautiful woman who worked at the station. In fact the entire staff from the General Manager on down were all foxes except of course for Jeff ‘n’ Jer who were the only males on staff and I’m pretty sure hired Little Tommy as quickly as they could so they could get some much needed relief. I have no idea what went on at the station or what happened after hours, but I do know that Jerry ended up marrying the Program Director and Jeff married the Promotion Director and they all lived happily ever after as millionaires.

I’ve been been coaching air talent for quite a while now and the most asked question over the years has been … How do I make more money. The answer is that the only way to make money in our business is to make management afraid you’re gonna leave. Today’s talent may want to consider getting a little help and changing their act because from where I sit their bosses don’t appear the least bit frightened.

Chasing good ratings is very similar to chasing a beautiful Woman. The first thing you have to do is get her to notice you. Next you have do something nice for her every day so you can hold her interest. Finally you have to get her to fall in love with you. I wish you luck!
Speaking of beautiful Women even gay guys are distracted by them.

The whole world may think of you as only one person but if you are real lucky you may become one person’s whole world.

Cami’s G’ma Maggie once informed me that any man can be a Father but it takes a hell of a man to be a Daddy!

Speaking of Daddies how come in the early pictures of us first becoming one do we all look too young to be capable of being one!

Strange how Casey Kasem chose Fathers day to exit the planet.

In Canada when the political party in power doesn’t do what it claimed it was going to do they call another election which is not cheap but it does tend to keep the empty promises down to a workable number.

One of the big surprises upon my becoming a Father was this realization that surged through my veins that I must provide for this little creature which was a very scary thought because I could barely look after myself let alone her and her Mother. Years later when I had another you would think I would have it all figured out and be calm about it. Not! I was once again was fearful of how I was going to provide for her. But it was a hell of a motivator.

Mankind doubled their knowledge every 100 years until the end of World War II when knowledge doubled every 25 years. Now we double our knowledge every 13 months and because of the Internet it is predicted that we soon will be doubling our knowledge every 12 hours.

Johnny Carson never had a Rock Band on the Tonight Show even though he had on lots of rock guests but he never had them play because Johnny was a Big Band guy.

I doubt Cami has ever heard a dial tone or even knows what it is let alone a rotary dialer.

These are three words you never want to hear yourself saying … Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda!

About 45 years ago God gave me my first Daughter which I figure was maybe a reminder about my past behavior. 28 years later he must have thought I needed another beautiful reminder.

Is there any issue both the Democrats and Republicans agree upon and also how do they decide who has first choice to choose what side of the issue they should be on.

How come a “Girls Weekend” is all planned out where as a “Guys Weekend” starts with meeting at some bar and figuring it all out from there. Wait a minute what am I thinking, once you’re married there are no “Guy Weekends” but still “Girl Weekends” … What’s up with that?
The folks may love listening to bizarre characters but they sure don’t wanna hear any bizarre music.
Rod Stewart claims that some people confuse a damaged larynx for soul.

Most ego maniacs are very insecure and I should know.

I remember in the days of 4 week books, every time the ratings weren’t like we wanted them to be, we always tightened up the radio station and threw out all the non hits. Sure enough when we were back at the ratings party somebody back at the station must have adding tunes and telling the air talent talk that it’s now OK again to talk too much about nothing.

Sometimes having a terrible boss is just the thing that you need to unite and motivate the staff even though it’s only their hate of him that has them united. Right Clippers?

Isn’t funny when your favorite tune comes on the radio you turn it all the way up so your neighbors can enjoy it too.
I think we may need a new PR firm to handle Fathers Day.

Why is too much of a good thing a bad thing.
I spent too much time with my family said no one on their death bed.
Sometimes I wonder just what Hitler’s Mom was really like.
One of my early goals was to become a great womanizer but I soon found out that I just wasn’t very good at it mainly because I can only handle one special Woman at a time.
When you hate someone you keep an emotional link going with them and until you finally let it go they will continue to be in charge of you.
According to Rich Stevens being fake doesn’t require plastic surgery.

7 thoughts on “What Was Hitler’s Mom Like?

  1. You mentioned Cdn Elections. At least they declare an Election – couple of weeks of politicking – Election held & it’s over. Americans go on & on ad nauseum, seems to start with their politicking for their next Election right after their last.

  2. Tim “Trucker” Bradley & Roy Hennessey among a lot of Canadians would definitely disagree with you about Fishing Trips. It was something you probably were never interested in. Americans still come up here to fish – it’s a big industry.

    • I still think it’s an “Old School” thing Em. Guys today don’t even golf they are too busy working and sharing household duties with their wives who also work.

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