I received some complaints that I was making light of rape in my last Blog and must be a Women hater. I was not writing about rape in any way and am outraged that someone would think so. Not only do I think rape is an inexcusable hate crime but I also have two lovely daughters (pictured) who if harmed in this or any other way the justice system wont be needing a Judge or Jury, I’ll just take care of it myself. As is usual for me I was pointing out more of the weird differences between the sexes. One of those differences is the unwritten rule … Thou shalt not help, hold, hug, kiss, caress, touch, approach, speak to, or walk beside a woman without her permission. Women on the other hand are restrained by no such rule when dealing with Men. Getting that point I realize would require a little thinking but what was I thinking is what your thinking right!
As far as me being a woman hater that’s laughable because I love and adore women. I must admit though that I am a little fearful of the power they have over me so I study them and what I now know of them I learned from them. I’m hoping to put that knowledge to good use by putting it on the radio soon and make a few bucks. The following is just some of the stuff some very wonderful Women have taught me. They wouldn’t lie to me would they?
My Sister Sandra showed me how easy it was for her to have me wrapped around her little finger which should have served as a warning for what was ahead.
My Mother told me I shouldn’t spend to much time alone because she claimed I have hermit type tendencies.
My Aunts showed me how cruel Women could be to each other while still loving one another.
My Grandmother taught me I was indeed just part of the family so I wouldn’t be getting any special instructions from her any time soon so I should stop waiting for them. (I’m still having trouble with that today)
Kelley Mitchell made me realize I know more about Woman now than I ever wanted to know.
Linda Stein told me the reason the Women in “The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo Trilogy” were attracted to and wanted to bed the kinda wimpy frumpy Michael Bloomquest was because he apologised to Women even when he had no reason to. She claims now that that wasn’t what she said, but that’s what I heard.
Laura Neville said the reason Women are so attracted to musicians is because they think of them as “God Like” which certainly isn’t even close to the truth. She unfortunately is somewhat of an expert on the subject.
Heather Emrick showed me one night that every once in a while a woman can bring it all together so well that a wife will lean over to her husband and whisper … You can leave me for her!
Ann McMartin taught me that most Women only have had at the most 5 affairs in their life. She also claimed that girls even have their Bridesmaids dresses all picked out by 11 years of age and are only looking for the right person to play the part of the groom at the huge wedding they have planned.
Bridget Hubbard told me she generally doesn’t let Radio people into her home but seeing as I seemed to be one of the smarter ones I was welcome until I said something dumb. I didn’t overstay my welcome but I’m not sure I got out in time.
Karen Curtis is showing me you can fight your way back and be great again.
Nance Chapman explained to me it’s OK to wear the big fake diamond ring as long as you have the matching real one back home in the safe.
Anne Craig proved you can actually become more sexy and beautiful as time goes by.
Beatrice Stackpole told me I needed to have a Latino girl and it should be one from Venezuela if at all possible because they possessed a certain magic that very few women have. But she also warned me to be wary because their magic was very addictive and life changing.
Donna Schaneen convinced me you can get a reputation of sleeping around without ever having to sleep around.
Joan Vidler proved to me that there are still some very good Women out there.
Kristine Hansen is going to show me and the World that age is just a number as she does Playboy the 2nd time around.
Lesley Palmiter proves my theory that most good real estate agents are very good looking.
Joyce Kaufman taught me if a woman has tenacity she can easily make her own way in the big bad world.
Cheryl Backes proved to me that over time that you can develop some affection for a Women even though you only get to see her at her Brother’s weddings.
Jan Hall and Marnie Howard showed me you can be very beautiful and very smart at the same time.
Betsy Cameron more than proves that theory to me weekly.
Robin Marshall makes me wonder about what she is or isn’t wearing all the time.
Joasia Holotka taught me some fantasies can last a lifetime.
Jo Myers killed me with how strong she is by making me laugh while she was going through a life threatening procedure.
Lorenda Rae showed me you can be a single Mom, nice, sweet, Religious, and very sexy all at the same time.
Pam Cesak convinced me that a Woman can be very very classy and still be a fun broad too.
Delilah proved to me that she deserves huge money because she does good with it.
Christina Johns shows me all the time that Men are powerless around a truly soft and sweet women.
Mary Ptak proved to me that you can take sweet to a whole new and wonderful level.
Cindy Adair convinced me a Woman who counts your money can look sexy doing it.
Jamie Gold taught me that most Women leave the bar scene at 27 and you’d better beware the ones who don’t.
Jo Ann Plug showed me once again that beautiful Women have a certain charm that gets you to work for free on their behalf.
One of the many things my Daughter Candis taught me was that breaking up with a “true love” was good for at least 3 new songs.
My Daughter Cami made me aware of the fact that you can be too young and too old all at the same time when you’re sweet 16. She also made me realize me my love for her is unconditional.
Barbara Hilliard told me Sex isn’t everything so I better shape up pretty soon and look for other good things in a Woman.
Robin Garrett taught me that a lot of Women are attracted to intelligent and powerful Men.
Sharon Henwood convinced me that sometimes good things come to he who waits.
Cyber Girl taught me that you can know a lot about some Women without even really knowing them at all.
Savvy Scopolleti taught me there is no better protector of a Man than the Women who loves him.
My Daughters second that emotion.
Lindy Rome convinced me that some Women are definitely born to lead.
Linda Krone showed me that Women make much better Radio Sales people than Men.
Danna Powers told me sometimes a Father is a better care giver for a child than a Mother.
Embree McDermid convinced me long ago that I had a lot more to learn about Women.
Linda Duffy taught me that sometimes a Man gets a way more than he deserves.
Debbie Abrams showed me that even self confessed gold diggers can be fun.
Lana Johns proved to me that one of the greatest things that could ever happen to a Man was becoming a Father.
Kari Summerfield proved it to me once again so count me in as a total believer but hey enough is enough.
Candis took it to a whole new level by making me a Buppa!
Margaret Mayer taught me to never tease a Woman unless you’re prepared for her to take you up on it.
Female authors showed me that a night of wild sex is only good copy for about half a page in their new book unlike the two chapters it takes for Males to describe the very same night.
Groupies made me run which I still do.